"Essence of Love in My Surroudings"

I sense an essence of love..
Flowing around me while I do whatever..
When we hold hands while walking together..
This emotional aurora brings brightness to my days..
Lay on my bed these nights as I stare and pray..
For this love to last will my ending days..
How this girl has made me dance..
I knew her love gave me the chance..
To change my mind, boy, and soul..
The words I said as we stare and lay..
Said I love you to her face..
I knew i followed my heart..
I thank you for choosing me..
For being the greatest love you will ever meet..
You're the one who wil be....mine....to keep..
The joy of my world is in you and nothing more..
Everytime I creep towards your door..
God tells me I am blessed............Why?
I ask the Lord, have you chosen me to be happy..
Only reply i receive is when I'm near you..
A gift so great is one made by the hands of God..
And he has presented me with you

dedicated to my love
in tha wurds of tha unspoken one:UnSpOkEn Wurdz

not so great but decent...

hmmm..pretty interesting...but it was simple...i mean u couldve done it better...but hey simplistic can make a piece really strong !!

and yeah if dedicated to someone special then fuck yeah..this is poetry...

the vocabs need to up a bit...the flow kinda off but its alright...

well drop some more..!

hahaha well check bout maybe a day or 2 ago fo my otha pieces...they were betta than this one..this was just a quick written i was writin at ery stop light....so i guess thats why my vocab an shit won't correct...anyways holla and flow was off cuz i was writin to tha beat of that lauryn hill song to zion off her miseducation of lauryn hill LP....i was tryna rhyme ta her style in dat track...

yea like shiz said it wus simple but it wus nice..................keep droppin those poetic visions ....and u will be alright...........once again Nice drop

Peep mine

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...5&pagenumber=2

i would peep it ruthless, but my comp is fucked up...ery time i press links my damn comp goes ballistic...just tell me wat tha joint called and where it at and i'll peep it