Not feeling Life right now

Cant be happy with my Life, even when I live it better
I Try to give out this love, but really I'm like fuck it whatever
Spent a long time looking for Treasure, just another wasted endeavor.
I keep my mind light as a feather, heart razor sharp when it goes through the shredder.
Soon be gone so I'm writing this letter, in my time here never was clever.
In that chair so just pull down the lever, in that darkness I will see forever.
Even my head you can sever & place it on a mountain top
Dismember every piece of me & still my soul is all I got.
Oh and I forgot that time will never stand still
But I can slow it down just by popping the right pill.
Another man I could never kill , I could only really kill myself
Dont get it fucking twisted ,I'll never be crying out for help
None of you care for mental health, why even keep trying to remain stealth.
I hate caring only about my self when others out there need it more than I
If I told you who I really am everyone of you would be mortified