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Thread: dont blink

  1. #1
    da-one
    Guest

    dont blink

    hatas can get ya for ya papas the second ya blink
    enemys will pop ya and want give you a second to think
    unload a whole clip on ya then they jet from the scene
    yall need to listen me to yall my message is clean
    dont blink cuz ya freinds will turn into ya foes i learned from that
    they paccing heat that will burn into ya clothes like a perm on scalp
    these days ya cant even trust ya family
    this is insanity what else can it be
    we moved off shaw road to live on pamallee?( right up the street not a good place neither)
    blink once and the one you chill with will stab you in the bacc
    needed money so he set it up to having yo ass jacced
    shit like that hurts like a spasm in ya bacc
    they'll run and snitch to the police so they taddle and rat
    ya friends(enemys) hide in the dark
    they just playing a role and got hired for the part
    and hatas got a desire for ya art
    now you dont know who to love like someone put pliers on ya heart
    neither one really wants you to be successfull
    so to them all of that shit is stressfull
    slugs! they wouldnt mind sending you a chest full
    until the day you gone is the only time they'll be restfull

    DONT BLINK!!!!!!!

  2. #2
    microcosm spokenoh's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Posts
    2,930
    Battle Record
    1-3
    Awards Haiku Season Champion
    What has Open Mic come to....Your flow was atrocious...and you lacked any significant multies, metaphors, and wordplay...Your subject was same old, gangster style...typical...Your structure needs to be fixed, your bars are stretched and didnt help the flow..and your vocab was below average. You needa straighten up your bars and try to put some multies in your pieces, along with larger vocabulary.
    Please return the favour.
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...37#post1147637
    can I kick it?

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