£clipse Of The Dead.

[split...]

£clpise Of The Dead.



2035 that day i wished i wouldve never woken up
if only me and my homies knew what was coming before it was upon us
you dont know the story, so let me tell you what happened on november 12th
a day of madness, senseless killing ,all started cuase it was the eclipse of the dead

It was 9:45 when i awoke that morning, not even aware of what was to come
i got in the shower and then put some clothes on, i decided to dress stylish on this one
got my rolex on with my cologne and i had to rock them jordans with a jay-z shirt
blue jeaned pants ; had me thinking i was the bomb, but none of that would matter
walked down the street to my girls house, figured id just chill with her, that plan was shattered
knocked on the door, she wasn't home so i went to my best freinds house to eat his bread
this kid is crazy, he thinks of himself as Baron P. Mortuss but i just call him B instead
so we just played basketball video games, i beat him so bad he decided to stop
turned on the news, they said it's supposed to be an eclipse today around 10 o'clock

oh snap that’s right now, I shouted in excitement
still blind to time as the fact that it would turn frightning

Split hollered with surprise, homies tight but he lost sight
when the fight broke I thought shit I lost hope that night
The vines grabbed- their tendrils trapping the trap house
inhabitants came screaming- maybe I’m delusional- How
can I see what I believe to be a mother killing her babies
her husband scraping up the plain pavement- now red see
the mock vanity of women was gone- stripping real fast
I got excited- then a blast past my head calmed me at last
the crass stench of urine filling the air- a pure sin stared
me in the eye- the cobra hissed- I fared better than the hare
being spit roasted by incipient men- empty glares- bloody hair
soft murmuring- I crept within the shadows towards the noise
saw a small baby- naked with birth juices covering- it poised
then a scream so unseeingly malign- it turned me mute
thinking alone- what the future could hold…I see no clues..

time is racing as my heart is pacing at what i am seeing
poeple killing and fighting to survive and get away from the bleeding
me an baron decide to hide in relli's house
rushing in the door while barricading, he shouts what is this all about
ever since the eclipse hit poeple been goin crazy, and killing each other
mother vs. daughter , father vs. son and even sister vs. brother
eyes are blood red, some are walking around with brains hangin out their head
we need to get weapons and food, so we can survive and fight the dead
but the bad thing is, we need to go out there, and probably end up like them
no, refuse it, born to survive and outlast, we were made to win

as long as we stay together we can survive this night
and live on to tell a story of an eclipse of fright

Vanished cheers, what now goes thru my ears I'm not believing
Chaos appears, years of fears and tears..what is the reason
Catastrophic visions, so I made a split decision to convert ways
But my inner incision made the division just more of hurt phase
Lost within this environment, although I'm precisely not the same
Its just so intricate, proving where I come from..I haven't forgot the name
What am I saying? I'm trapped in a place where the dead prevails
Trying vigorously to get ahead..................but instead, we trail
Realizing its no point for effort..my days are over, time to face my night
As I lay down willingly..forgive me, GOD..suddenly a shadow replace my light

where the fuck did relli go?, i told him not to leave the group
damnit he never listens, but hopefully he'll be back with us soon

as we approach the food store, we encounter many of the living dead
i cant believe we are suffering all this just to get some bread
they chase and persue us, running in fear as baron tripped

go on with out me, ill stay back and fight them
are you sure?
..yes just go, ill be ok, for i believe in "him"

running by myself im thinking "shit how the fuck am i gonna make it past this"
as i make it to the store, what i see amazes me, so many poeple dead alive
but i refuse to die, swingin fist and elbows, heads toss and im loving the thrive
the drive to survive is tearing me apart inside, but finally im cornered
laying on the ground they bite in my legs first, the pain is untakeable it hurts
as i lay there to wait and die, i look out the half shattered glass window
i look in awe, because i can see the light, now they're at my ribs,i watch the wind blow
a glimpse of wince, my eyes sight relli laying motionlessly, but just as a head
many die in agonizing pain, to be forgotton in the eclipse of the dead

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...lk-345977.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...rn-346002.html

relli =brown
baron =green
split= blue
italics= talking

[split...]

Bump.

[Dreamer22]

lol alright this was fun to read because it was consistant with the thought pattern and the tone of voice you used or your dialog. But an eclipse that turns people into zombies - yeah its original alright, but it's was like a jokingly funny enterainment read you were takin too serious lol...no thats really not what I mean, I'm just saying it didn't have a secret message or some type of moral, not that I really care about that, it's just in OM you see a lot of that. Anyways, I liked reading this and I was reading this in my head like 'damn, this could sound really good on a track' seriously bro don't ask me why I really don't know anything about you except from seein you in battles, but you impressed me here, I really didn't know you could drop something like this. Though, the ending was kinda 'eh' I wanted to see you survive not die lolz...for a topical this is a lot better than I can do, so this isn't bad, I just wana see you drop something with a 'profound' topic or sum shit Pce homie

[split...]

word lol, that was the twist at the end..

cuz mostly people always survive and shit, this time its different
but thankz for feeding me

Bump.

[split...]

bump for some food..

leave links and ill RTF

[split...]

bump again, leave links, ill RTF

[_Lyrics]

rotfl... this was a nice piece, it had a kind of bright comedic side to it for a story portrayed with horror and death. made me think of shaun of the dead, or a 1980s movies, like return or the living dead. each person flowed with a similar vibe, and very consistent in the story. some of Splits verse came from nowhere tho, a little wierd man, lol, going to Barons house just to eat his bread? It still showed strength with imagery. and the internals from your end verse showed that it could be just as serious too. Barons verse played off well, describing how the situation started right after just chillen out playin some basketball, its almost believeable. both of you had some nice imagery. I think it was hilerious that relli just layed down flat on the ground to just die. I can tell you all put some effort into this and it came out to be a really good read.

Quotables-

the mock vanity of women was gone- stripping real fast
I got excited- then a blast past my head calmed me at last
the crass stench of urine filling the air- a pure sin stared
me in the eye- the cobra hissed- I fared better than the hare

What am I saying? I'm trapped in a place where the dead prevails
Trying vigorously to get ahead..................but instead, we trail
Realizing its no point for effort..my days are over, time to face my night
As I lay down willingly..forgive me, GOD..suddenly a shadow replace my light

as i make it to the store, what i see amazes me, so many poeple dead alive
but i refuse to die, swingin fist and elbows, heads toss and im loving the thrive
the drive to survive is tearing me apart inside,
a glimpse of wince, my eyes sight relli laying motionlessly, but just as a head
many die in agonizing pain, to be forgotton in the eclipse of the dead

[split...]

thankz for the feed, and yeah thats what i was aiming for in my verse, a lil bit of comedy but then get serious, but anyways thanks again


bump

[split...]

bump

[Johnny 6-feet]

A good use of story telling flow with all of you managing to stay on point and keep the thing moving. The vocab was a little choppy in a few places but you described what was happening well most of the time. A few multi's would've been cool but the topic was enough to draw me in until the end; difficult to do in a piece this length.

Keep posting fella's.

[split...]

coo, thanks man...

[7th Crescent]

This was a nice crew topical..figured it would be hard to keep my attention with the length but honestly was pleasantly suprised..the flow was nice..multies would have bumped up the enjoyment but not always need to deliver a sick piece..the imagery was on point...the content was sick..over all very nice work...8.0/10

[split...]

coo thankz for the feed...