Reflections

[.Prime.]

Your age old body is getting decayed
Torn broken in pieces only cancer remained
Contaminating your lungs, your soul, your very spirit
Crying to the world but only you yourself can hear it
Your time has come and gone and your now near lifes end
Wishing you had more chances, decisions you want to amend
Knowing that in fact your attitude was always pretend
Thinking being tough and strong was a good message to send
But now you have regrets on the days that have gone by
Thoughts racing inside knowing your strength was a lie
Because everyone is scared and anticepating whats comes next
Leaving your life behind, the life which was so complex
They say rest in peace and hapiness is always the answer
But who really knows what comes after your cancer
Seeing thoughts as a kid and how you where so cold hearted
Beating and blaming on others when you where the one who started
But now your up on the plate and your time has come
Deaths knocking on your door, what comes next has begun
No more hapiness, light, and absolutely no sun
Only saints go to heaven, knowing your not the one
Your chances have come and gone holding deaths very hand
The feeling is bitter cold like beach on the sand
No leaving now, you can't be the one who ran
Closing your eyes and taking your very last breath
Goodbye good world, I wonder what comes after death...

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...468/index.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...232/index.html

[Calli]

this was not a bad verse at all, got simple at times, but still was meaningful enough move right past that, the flow was cool for the most part, think the topic was well written, think you could have written the verse better but you hit the topic.

No more hapiness, light, and absolutely no sun
Only saints go to heaven, knowing your not the one

this was my favorite line, simple but still had a deeper shadow behind it......

Keep writing bruh

[.Prime.]

Thanks, uppin for feedback...

[.Prime.]

uppin for feedback...

[2triple0]

this was alright it was a bit short didnt get into the story much but i thought that the first 5-10 lines were pretty complex and had a lot of impact to the rest of the verse. so you started this off alright, but you needed to take it somewhere.... it needed to land somewhere so that you could put out your concepts for us.... it seemed like you didn't get in full flight in this piece, you just got it started up but didnt run the engine if you know what i mean... anyways i thought you had good imagery and the image was really cool that you chose... i'm sorry i didnt understand the piece on the higher level, and im not trying to pick at the piece... if anything it sounded great, and had a good flow to it... there were parts towards the end i thought you were falling off but it still seemed to hold itself together quite nicely... anyways if you could please rtf on my piece Be Yourself... and i would greatly appreciate it!



ps- i grew up in boston and lived in worcester for a year when i was like 17... just thought its cool that your from mass too keep up bro!

[Iglosone]

yeah.. this was a good piece.. liked the emotion in it.. shit mad me sad

[.Prime.]

uppin for feedback...

[*Peedi*]

thats crazy im working on a song called reflectionz on my mixtape that droppin pretty hott verse be back lata to feed, ill edit this post

[Lizman]

This was a nice enough piece
While you had some roadbumbs to overcome, you made your point fairly clear in the description and the content you wanted to bring across

"They say rest in peace and hapiness is always the answer"
"Your time has come and gone"

[teflon151]

i felt inspired lol...it was a good piece dog, good imagery.