Horrorcore

[The Genesis]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...72&postcount=6
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...62&postcount=2

Feedback is always appreciated & returned.


[Genesis]
Ayo I'm horrorcore, rush you in your corridor
Snuff you with chloroform, and drag you back to my laborator
The lord of war, will slice your vocal cords, with sorted swords
With the morbid force, to cause some drama like the Source Awards
I'll gore your corpse, and savagely kill your family
Like Amityville and still I'm havocly buildin' anarchy
Ravaging rappers rabidly, ripping and ravishing
Rancid remains, randomly rambling rhetoric, rapidly
Casually countin' casualties, crambin' cranial cavities
With candidly cancerous cannibalistic calamities
Creatin' catastrophes, causin' carnage, crackin' cartilage
Crafty carpenters, carvin' cadavers, carrying carcasses
An arsonist, with an arsenal, armed with arsenic
Artillery and ammunition aimed at artistses
I'll carve your wrists, and fuck up your facial features
Drain a liter, of blood out your brain, then flush all your pain relievers
I'll feature the Devil on my final album, on the vinyl volume
He'll come through your mind, into your spinal column
Throw the bible on him, soaked in holy water
Or he'll send you back to Christ, and sacrifice your only daughter
My whole persona's in a battle stance, you don't stand a chance
When I bash your skull, then pull the ambalance
I have to blast you, I’ll catch you and smash and trample
Over your body, then throw it in the lobby, at the tabernacle
Scalp you with a jagged scalpel, at the Catholic chapel
Slash your Adam's apple, and trap you in my enchanted castle
But I'd rather strap you, with plastic explosives
And gas to engulf it, with a match to throw it in your casket and close it

[Que-C]

ok . . . you vocab and rhyme scheme abilities are good, so im not gonna talk about that . . . but, the whole papoose letter shit, is whack, even when he did it . . . thats better technique building, but when that shit goes on a track and even when read, its babble. when i first started readin it, i liked it, but when that shit started happenin i almost stopped readin it. its jus a lil too much, know what i mean, its a strain and a lil over rated, this to me would be way back learnin how to rap and throwin a whole bunch of rhymes and literary devices together, for sure you got the point across you were tryin to make, but it didn't go no where, there was no point per say, which is cool for what it is, dont get me wrong, but its only cool for what it is. try rhymin like that in a story line, and wit out the letter thing, if you do the letter thing tone it down a lil, its tooooooo much. it limits you which like i said is better for technique building, and youll only be recognized for the vocab and flow and word play, the "writing" aspects, but not for the depth of content and not the over all connection of the piece, it dont hit hard.

all the positives like i said you were on fuckin point, but jus loosen it up, and set it to sometin more tangible

Ayo I'm horrorcore, rush you in your corridor
Snuff you with chloroform, and drag you back to my laborator
The lord of war, will slice your vocal cords, with sorted swords
With the morbid force, to cause some drama like the Source Awards

hottest, especially how you left out the "y" in laboratory to make it rhyme, gotta be creative to make it work like that

[kami.kaze]

SHHHHHHHHIIIIIITTTT talk about extreme assimilation, or what ever and i liked the internals, lol... flow was insane.
hit me up please
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...html?p=6782940

[IconIQ]

yeah, your back on your horrorcores lol.

i think your intro was the best part of the whole drop, n chopping laboratory was pretty creative and it actually worked well. bizarrely enough!


Ayo I'm horrorcore, rush you in your corridor
Snuff you with chloroform, and drag you back to my laborator
The lord of war, will slice your vocal cords, with sorted swords
With the morbid force, to cause some drama like the Source Awards

anyhow, i thought the alliteration you used here was good, nice to see something a little more complex in a drop. plus you kept on topic and actually pulled it off jus as nice, if not nicer, then some of your other bars.

Ravaging rappers rabidly, ripping and ravishing
Rancid remains, randomly rambling rhetoric, rapidly
Casually countin' casualties, crambin' cranial cavities
With candidly cancerous cannibalistic calamities
Creatin' catastrophes, causin' carnage, crackin' cartilage
Crafty carpenters, carvin' cadavers, carrying carcasses
An arsonist, with an arsenal, armed with arsenic


n a sick closer to a sick drop.

Scalp you with a jagged scalpel, at the Catholic chapel
Slash your Adam's apple, and trap you in my enchanted castle
But I'd rather strap you, with plastic explosives
And gas to engulf it, with a match to throw it in your casket and close it

its all good here man, i dont needa give you no indepth feed. 1

[The Genesis]

props to all for the feed, it's already been returned.

[Sting3r]

This was nice, and entertaining.. usually I don't go for alliteration in such high doses.. but at least it stayed on topic..

I have to blast you, I’ll catch you and smash and trample
Over your body, then throw it in the lobby, at the tabernacle
Scalp you with a jagged scalpel, at the Catholic chapel
Slash your Adam's apple, and trap you in my enchanted castle

that reminded me of pun a bit..

but any how.. the ending was kinda funny to me..
nicely worded..

and yeah.. THIS WAS NICE

[Gabriel570]

yo I think i read this oneee beforeee
but regardless that sounds pretty Ill yo

[Johnny 6-feet]

I could swear i've read this somewhere before. Is this a repost? I dug the concept, always liked the horrorcore style of rap, did a few pieces like this myself about 8 months ago. The use of alliteration was cool, a little overboard in some places, the use of vocab was strong, use of imagery was strong too. Rhyme scheme could've been a little righter but it was still easy to read.

Keep posting and please rtf.

[D-block 2010]

to tell you the truth i was gonna say it reminded me alot of papooses abc's slaughter... which is decent too bad you kinda jumped into it then left it... overall i digged it good flow sounded like alot of energy


lets give the man a break here he was trying to incorperate a half new idea here

[Sniper Clown]

Motherfucker you were on fire!!!!

Those alliterations just ripped thru the game.... Cant put shit as favorite cuz the whole verse was holding my attention and i have very very short attention span.

[theprojekt]

unbelievable man. your rhymes and flow was amazing. good shitt

[The Genesis]

'preciate the feed yall, it's been returned, up...