' I always seem to find my ass lodged in the sofa,' cried a disgruntled man to wife.
' And my eyes, void, absorbed by the television screen.'
' It also seems my mind is deteriorating at an unbearably, sluggish rate.'
' I try, sometimes, to imagine what it looks like, my mind,' he said.
' I picture a charred fetus writhing in a mess of mothers intestines, unable to dislodge nor recede. '
__________________________________________________ _______________
oh hell no. lol
"In a hail of sparks
And a tangle of wires
Everything went wrong"
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Haha. That bad, huh?
Its not as bad as you think...the idea is def chopped and the structure is terrible...but the content could be developed and the vocabulary is quite decent. Tho "ass" should only be used for emphasis poetry isnt rap and words like that should be used sparingly and only in hyperbolic situations. You have potential I would like to see you steer your ability to a better articulated concept Im sure you could do alright
"the ink of a scholar, is worth a thousand times more, than the blood of a martyr"--lupe fiasco
"I'm sonnin' ya'll like father's day/disrespect pop and get popped like Marvin Gaye" Skillz
WRITTEN VOICES
Lol thanks.
I write prose poetry mainly, this is something a little different that I just felt like posting up - although, I still consider it to be prose poetry.
I used to be in Written Voices btw, when it had witness, onslaught, poeta, me, baron p among others.
Last edited by Dkoi; August 8th, 2011 at 02:23 PM
Posting Rules
Reply With Quote