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Thread: ..::..GoT BurNeD::..::

  1. October 1st, 2003, 06:28 PM #1
    sILLable
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    ..::..GoT BurNeD::..::

    /\/\Intro\/\/
    ~~your special-to-me, i bet-you-cant-see, what u did when u up-and-left-me~~
    Ive been searchin-night-and-day, workin-might-be-gay, but its worth-it-to-find-you-babe//

    to find you is a challenge, without you im unbalanced, your part of my talent, tired of bein silent//

    never once was violent but i was always there, cared for you and i would braid ya hair//

    laid you there, feelin excited, my lines i recited, cause i just couldnt fight-it//

    now i need you in my world, your my diamond, your my pearl, when i see you my mind swirls//

    you shinebright, your my lime-light, your what im thinkin bout when i rhyme-tight//

    your my inspiration, you keep me from disintigratin,instigatin my situation, i see now its cause u loved me and wanted to see what i was facin//

    so i took u for granted, my only love on this planet, im not a thug but im jammin//

    you took care of me when i was ill, so now i feel, since im ill i will fill that gap//

    so still i rap, waitin patient for u to return, cant believe i got burned, obviously i still have shit to learn..


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  2. October 1st, 2003, 08:07 PM #2
    sILLable
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    uppin this TOPICAL piece^^^^^^^^


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  3. October 2nd, 2003, 02:59 AM #3
    Mistral
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    Pretty good piece i thought, it made a nice read, your mutlies were pretty good, and it flowed pretty decent through out the piece, content was good, overall id say it was pretty good. keep dropping.

    and if you could return some feedback..
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=83050
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  4. October 2nd, 2003, 06:18 AM #4
    sILLable
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    uppin this for some more replies, yall wanted a topical piece and here it is now noone wants to reply j/j.^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^


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  5. October 2nd, 2003, 06:22 AM #5
    noncentz
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    it was explemplory of real rhymin this subject never gets old or dies i enjoyed it.it is being slept on but if the right heads read this more will come to appreciate it.
    to love something,is to die for it ,if you do, your a martyr , but these days music is morbid, false carters ..prohet's for prophet no lie, look how our last martyr was crucified. to put it in it symplicity, you aint true...you wouldnt sacrifice a few dollars for authenticity..
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  6. October 2nd, 2003, 12:14 PM #6
    Keys aka Vital
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    It was ok, but i feel like right now love-rap's gettin exploited what with fabolous and floetry and ashanti remixes... overall its original,
    but i think my biggest beef is the way you wrote it. other than that you did good. flow slipped at times, but all the while it was smooth. Good Goin, keep droppin

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    I’d explain it to you, but I don’t have any crayons with me.
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  7. October 2nd, 2003, 07:47 PM #7
    sILLable
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    thanks for tha replies.uppin^^^^^


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  8. October 2nd, 2003, 10:07 PM #8
    Inertia
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    like everyone else has said it was good...multies were nice but the lines needed more detail...I mean the piece was good in ways and topic stayed consitent throughout...nice job though, dawg....keep droppin...

    ~1~

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    I'm descending from the sky like Gabriel the arch angel
    with weight of world on shoulders like Aretha Franklin's ankles Chino XL
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  9. October 2nd, 2003, 11:01 PM #9
    sILLable
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    thanks for the replies, uppin^^^^


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  10. October 7th, 2003, 10:01 PM #10
    sILLable
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    uppin this one more time.~1~
    ^^^^^


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